Cheri Elson Sperber and Allen G. Drescher, Retired
21 S. 2nd St. ● Ashland ● Oregon ● 97520

Enjoying the Holidays with Loved Ones Living with Dementia

Teepa Snow is someone I’ve spoken of before – as one of America’s leading educators on dementia, her philosophy is reflective of her education, work experience, available medical research, and first hand caregiving interactions.

This article comes from her newsletter, and although I may not have focused it so strongly on Christmas (there being lots of other holidays out there!), I think the gist of the article is quite good.

If you are caring for a loved one living with dementia, I hope this article gives you some thoughts and ideas about enjoying the holiday season with your loved one, whatever your holiday may be!

Enjoying the Holidays

Caregiver Syndrome and How to Avoid it

A caregiver is anyone who provides care for another person in need. According to, in 2012, 36% of Americans, most of whom are women, provided unpaid care to another adult in the past year.  As Baby Boomers age, this number is expected to rise.

Caregivers are special people – big-hearted, sensitive, responsible, well-intentioned; they are motivated by and feel a great sense of satisfaction knowing they are doing right by their loved one.  However, it is often at the expense of the caregiver’s health and results in Caregiver Syndrome.

Caregiver Syndrome is a state of physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion resulting from the caregiver’s lack of self-care.  It is typically a chronic, long-term challenge as the caregiver often faces years of caregiving responsibilities. Caregivers of those with dementia are among the most likely to suffer from Caregiver Syndrome.  If you are caring for a spouse; if you live with the person you are caring for; if your loved one exhibits behavior or care needs that are challenging; if you feel you have no choice about caregiving; if you are responsible for young children as well as the person for whom you are providing care, you are at more risk of suffering from Caregiver Syndrome.

Without sufficient help and support, the caregiver is left vulnerable to wide range of physical and emotional problems, putting their health at risk and affecting their ability to provide care. Some of the physical health risks include heart disease, depression, compromised immune system, weight gain, and sleep deprivation. 

It is easy to get caught up in all of the things that our loved one needs, but if you aren’t healthy, who is going to care for your loved one?  Taking care of yourself is of the utmost importance.  (There is a reason why the flight attendants tell the passengers to put their air masks on before assisting anyone else!)

Here are some tips to prevent or manage caregiver stress and help avoid Caregiver Syndrome:

  • Ask for and accept help. This can be a friend or a professional. Having even a few hours were extremely important in maintaining one’s own health.
  • Take care of your health. Find time to go for a walk, or other exercise, even if it’s not for an optimal length of time.  Fresh air and sunlight can do wonders.
  • Join a support group. Being a caregiver can be very isolating.  Joining a support group puts you in contact with others dealing with very similar circumstances as you – they “get” it in a way others may not, and understanding you are not alone can help a lot.
  • Talk to a professional. Most therapists, social workers, and clergy members are trained to work with individuals dealing with a wide range of issues, including those suffered by caregivers.

Whatever you are able to do for yourself will help you care for your loved one.  You owe to you both.

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